Do you remember Excitement? The feeling of joy and giggles and butterflies in your stomach, when you had delicious anticipation of your birthday party or a big holiday coming? What happened to that buoyant feeling? When did Excitement turn to Anxiety for you? Was it when expectations were unmet? Was it when disappointments crept in? Was it when play turned to chores and obligations turned to overwhelm?
Anxiety can be the shadow side of Excitement. ‘So much’ as a child can turn to ‘too much’ as a young adult when there is already a lot evolving in your mind, body and soul. Is Anxiety, then, familiar to you? Whether or not you are diagnosed with a clinical mental health disorder, Anxiety can be an unwanted newcomer within. Or, for some, the newcomer may have turned into the guest who never leaves. Can you see this picture? You feel Excitement about Something Big Coming and Excitement gets filled with questions, you get flooded with negative thoughts. Then Overwhelm draws dark curtains, your mind closes to Opportunity, Joy and Possibility, and you lose yourself. Can you feel the shrouded unrequited feeling?
You see it, feel it, shrug your shoulders and allow it to stay over there, just out of reach. But what if it was within reach? What if you stood up straight and tall, stretched out your arm in front of you as far as it could go, opened your hand wide and felt the tip of your fingers touch it? What if, when you touch it, you breathe and throw back the curtains? What if the light begins to flood in and you feel a spark sizzle up your arm, travel throughout your body and shock your heart? What if you give yourself permission to feel Excitement again, to discover your authentic you? Something Big is Coming.
Don’t fear it. Don’t block it. Don’t stay behind the dark, drawn curtains. You’re on the stage behind the curtain, head down praying, butterflies inciting, “Is it my turn now?” Breathe deeply, oxygenate your internal systems, stand up straight and tall, reach out both of your arms in front of you-as far as they can go-open your hands wide and feel the spark. Curtain up! Fear not, feel Excited. Something Big is Coming.
Awe can be the light side of Excitement. But ‘Awe,’ you say? That’s not for me. I’m not saintly. I’m not larger than life, or better than anyone else or even truly better than my own thoughts allow. But Awe can be for you if you breathe deeply, get quiet inside and listen. Feel the stirrings of your child Soul. Breathe again, get quieter still and listen even more deeply. Your child Soul prays for Excitement again. Help her throw back the dark curtains, feel the spark, jump for Joy, imagine the Possibilities and know Awe. Dig deep. Find your Truth. Choose, decide, commit now. Something Big is Coming. Step out and let Awe in.